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  • bills
    which examines each person s unique relationship with money in three separate dimensions acquisition use and management This column explores a tool that you and your clients can use to trace money personalities through several generations I use it in Filed Under Children and Money Financial Reflection Modeling Values Money Stories Talking about Money Tagged With affluence bills children estate expenses finances genogram money money management responsible values wealth Understanding Your Relationship With Money In my last column I talked about my two year 1995 97 study of sudden wealth An incidental side effect of that study was the development of a three dimensional model of money relationships that is the subject of this column As part of my doctoral dissertation I reviewed the psychological literature dealing with money Prior Filed Under Financial Literacy Financial Reflection Modeling Values Talking about Money Tagged With acquisition bills finances money money management values Fill out the form below to begin receiving our Monthly Newsletter Finacial Literacy Tips and more right to your inbox About Us Helping families cope psychologically is essential for developing the refined financial intelligence most clients are seeking today Eileen Gallo Ph D Eileen Gallo is a licensed psychotherapist in

    Original URL path: http://www.galloconsulting.com/Financially-Intelligent-Parenting/tag/bills/ (2016-04-28)
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  • patterns
    including money Filed Under Children and Money Tagged With allowance bills children credit cards financially intelligent parent money money management money personality patterns responsible values Money and Child Development Part I In the 1950s psychoanalyst Erik Erikson identified a sequence of eight developmental stages that we all go through from birth to old age Five stages occur during childhood completing them successfully contributes to healthy personalities The trust stage is from birth until about age two A child s task is to develop a view of the Filed Under Children and Money Tagged With children money money personality patterns values Fill out the form below to begin receiving our Monthly Newsletter Finacial Literacy Tips and more right to your inbox About Us Helping families cope psychologically is essential for developing the refined financial intelligence most clients are seeking today Eileen Gallo Ph D Eileen Gallo is a licensed psychotherapist in private practice in Los Angeles where she assists individuals and families with the psychological and Read More Categories Charity Children and Money Chores Financial Literacy Financial Reflection Modeling Values Money Stories Talking about Money Uncategorized Archives June 2011 October 2010 Recent Articles The Seven Beliefs of Financially Intelligent Parents Part

    Original URL path: http://www.galloconsulting.com/Financially-Intelligent-Parenting/tag/patterns/ (2016-04-28)
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  • Children and Money
    does not develop a work ethic It may increase their stress Filed Under Children and Money Chores Financial Literacy Modeling Values Tagged With children responsible values work ethic Helping Our Children Develop A Work Ethic Part II This entry is part 2 of 3 in the series Helping Our Children Develop A Work Ethic In Part One we looked at the importance of helping our kids to develop a work ethic We explained that there are three areas that provide parents with opportunities to teach kids to be industrious and responsible for their work Chores School and Jobs In this Part we are going to look at the role Filed Under Children and Money Chores Financial Literacy Modeling Values Tagged With children financially intelligent parent money responsible values work ethic Helping Our Children Develop a Work Ethic Part I This entry is part 1 of 3 in the series Helping Our Children Develop A Work Ethic Kids aren t naturally diligent or naturally lazy A work ethic is learned behavior and as a parent you re the one who teaches your kids to acquire it If you re like most parents you want your children to work hard and derive meaning and satisfaction from what they do Unfortunately you may be sending them another Filed Under Children and Money Chores Financial Literacy Modeling Values Tagged With allowance children financially intelligent parent responsible values work ethic Getting Your Money Story Straight Part IV This entry is part 4 of 4 in the series Getting Your Money Story Straight Financially intelligent parents present a unified front when dealing with money issues This behavior takes a bit of work and practice and we ve found that a number of techniques facilitate integrating this behavior into your routine Perhaps the first and best thing you and your spouse can do is to create Filed Under Children and Money Financial Reflection Modeling Values Money Stories Talking about Money Tagged With acquisition allowance children finances financially intelligent parent money money management money messages responsible values Getting Your Money Story Straight Part III This entry is part 3 of 4 in the series Getting Your Money Story Straight In the first two Parts of this Article we ve looked at money stories and money personalities Now we want to examine two negative money messages that many of us send our children money as taboo and money as cause of argument Money as a taboo topic Psychologists and financial writers love Filed Under Children and Money Financial Reflection Modeling Values Money Stories Talking about Money Tagged With children credit cards finances money money management money messages responsible saving values Getting Your Money Story Straight Part II This entry is part 2 of 4 in the series Getting Your Money Story Straight In Part One of this Article we discussed your money story and introduced the concept of your money personality as it reveals itself in the dimensions of how you acquire money how you manage money and how

    Original URL path: http://www.galloconsulting.com/Financially-Intelligent-Parenting/category/children-and-money/page/2/ (2016-04-28)
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  • Children and Money
    parent money money management responsible values Engaging In Difficult Money Discussions Part II In our last column we were looking at why parents have a hard time talking to their kids about money and we began looking at some guidelines to having productive conversations about money with your kids Let s continue that exploration A close relative of the why won t you question is the why can t I question Filed Under Children and Money Modeling Values Talking about Money Tagged With children college discussion financially intelligent parent money money management responsible values Engaging In Difficult Money Discussions Part I One of the most important behaviors of financially intelligent parents is being able to talk to your kids about money Financially intelligent parents understand that they teach their kids a lot about money through their modeling behavior but they also understand that they teach them even more in day to day conversations that involve money Filed Under Children and Money Modeling Values Talking about Money Tagged With budget checkbook children credit cards discussion finances financially intelligent parent money money management responsible spending values Divorce Your Children and Money Bill a 45 year old divorced father of two teen age children received a phone call from his 16 year old son Brian who lived with Bill s ex wife Brian wanted to take karate lessons and his mother would pay half if Bill paid the other half Bill was silent for a few moments and then Filed Under Children and Money Financial Reflection Money Stories Tagged With allowance children college estate finances financial planning money responsible Children and Allowances Part II In our last column we introduced allowances as a means of helping our children learn self reflection and impulse control and recommended that all children receive an allowance In this column we will look at two more recommendations Recommendation 2 Allowances should not be tied to chores Chores are done because kids are members of the Filed Under Children and Money Chores Modeling Values Tagged With allowance children credit cards expenses finances financially intelligent parent money responsible values Children and Allowances Part I When it comes to making money decisions kids are frequently impulsive In fact when it comes to making most decisions kids are impulsive It doesn t matter if the choice involves money food or friends they often react without thinking Children simply aren t born with the capacity for self observation and the ability to control their impulses Filed Under Children and Money Modeling Values Tagged With allowance budget children credit cards finances financially intelligent parent money management responsible values Becoming A Charitable Family All of us want our children to have a healthy relationship with money We want them to learn how to handle their allowances wisely to balance their checkbooks and not to abuse credit cards But a healthy relationship with money goes far beyond simply being a good money manager Our kids need to grow up Filed Under Charity Children and Money Modeling

    Original URL path: http://www.galloconsulting.com/Financially-Intelligent-Parenting/category/children-and-money/page/3/ (2016-04-28)
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  • Children and Money
    Among Filed Under Children and Money Financial Literacy Tagged With children credit cards finances money management responsible values Why It Isn t Nice To Fool The Tooth Fairy Welcome We re delighted to introduce The Financially Intelligent Parent Blog Ever since Warren Buffett announced that he was giving some of his billions to The Bill and Melinda Gates Foundation the press has been full of articles and speculation on the possible negative effects that money can have on children Eileen and I don t believe Filed Under Children and Money Modeling Values Tagged With children finances money responsible values Previous Page 1 3 4 5 Fill out the form below to begin receiving our Monthly Newsletter Finacial Literacy Tips and more right to your inbox About Us Helping families cope psychologically is essential for developing the refined financial intelligence most clients are seeking today Eileen Gallo Ph D Eileen Gallo is a licensed psychotherapist in private practice in Los Angeles where she assists individuals and families with the psychological and Read More Categories Charity Children and Money Chores Financial Literacy Financial Reflection Modeling Values Money Stories Talking about Money Uncategorized Archives June 2011 October 2010 Recent Articles The Seven Beliefs

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  • Helping Our Children Develop A Work Ethic – Part III
    homework B We re spending a lot of money sending you to private school so we expect your grades to demonstrate you re grateful for this opportunity D We hope you ll take advantage of the opportunities to enroll in classes and do the type of projects that are unavailable at public school B It s good that you received a 97 on your fifth grade English test but with a little more effort you could have received 100 D 97 is a terrific score tell us what you wrote about B To be the top student in Mrs Jones class you need to talk to her figure out what she s looking for and give it to her D If Mrs Jones expects you to do projects a certain way but you feel strongly that there s a better way to do it that s okay with us but we suggest that you talk to her about your plans Beyond distinguishing between these two types of advice in your school related discussions you can do a number of other things to facilitate a work ethic Specifically Communicate through your actions that you believe it s important to make a solid effort at school It s not just saying that you believe it s important but taking actions that reinforce what you say To that end make sure you create a quiet environment for your child to do his homework set rules regarding interruptions such as phone calls and online communication You should also provide your child with resources for doing well at school dictionaries encyclopedias online access for research purposes Attend school open houses parent teacher conferences and your child s school related activities sports plays music Involve yourself as opposed to just observing in her school work This doesn t mean do the work for her hover over her while she does homework or correct every mistake on every paper she brings home It does mean making yourself available when she asks for your help Assist with drills and help her learn to prioritize assignments Don t just talk about homework but also ask if graded papers or projects were handed back what tests and class projects are coming up and so on Double check with the teachers on a periodic basis to make sure that your child is handing in all homework and what grades have been handed back recently Some parents believe that their children don t want them involved in the school process Don t believe it Jacquelynne Eccles a Professor of Psychology at the School of Education of the University of Michigan has studied programs designed to foster parental involvement in their children s schools Her research discloses that children want their parents to be involved Initiate conversations about school related ideas Too often parent child discussions about school revolve around grades Instead focus on ideas raised in school Talk about the subject of an essay your child wrote or what motivated him to

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  • Helping Our Children Develop A Work Ethic – Part II
    the house Let the kids participate in figuring out the basic chores from doing the dishes to raking leaves to keeping the family room clean and who should do them Do some chores alongside your kids Family chores become a battleground when kids think their parents are foisting work off on them so they can relax So pitch in Communicate that chores are part of everyone s life Raking leaves or shoveling snow with your children may seem like ordinary activities but doing them together transforms them into something meaningful and even fun Shared chores like these also foster a sense of teamwork Help them integrate chores into their routines As your kids grow up they will have other responsibilities homework sports private lessons that seem to have a higher priority than household chores They need to practice juggling the low priority tasks with the high priority ones When they become adults juggling personal and professional responsibilities little tasks and big ones is constant People who do it well tend to lead balanced successful lives Start your kids out on the right foot by teaching them that they have to allow five minutes in the morning to make their beds and clean their rooms and a half hour on weekends to do some yard work Show them how they can create a schedule for their week on the computer or by using a calendar Share your chore expectations Children internalize their parents expectations these expectations are usually more powerful than consequences Let your kids know that you expect them to pick up after themselves that picking up is just a given in your family Sharing your expectations provides you with the bulletproof answer when they ask why they have to clean up their room when their friend Charlie doesn t have to That s the way we do things at our house Foster accountability for assigned responsibilities In other words you want them to feel a sense of accomplishment for doing their tasks the right way and on time you also want them to recognize that they are responsible for the consequences if they fail to do so One of the best ways of achieving this latter goal is by linking consequences to the nature of a given chore If you get stuck trying to figure out how to do this think of Johnny and his chair Johnny age five was driving his parents crazy by rocking his chair back and forth at the dinner table Meal after meal Johnny s parents would first ask him to stop rocking and then tell him to stop Meal after meal Johnny kept rocking And why not It made him the center of attention and put him in control of what was being talked about One night when Johnny came to dinner his chair was missing Johnny said his father since you can t use your chair correctly we ve had to put it away What am I supposed to do asked Johnny

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  • Helping Our Children Develop a Work Ethic – Part I
    consequences of instilling a work ethic in your kids and negative consequences from failing to do so Parents who aren t aware of the importance of helping their children develop a work ethic frequently take the easy way out and allow their kids to slide Specifically they Permit their kids to get away with not doing their chores because it s too much of a hassle to keep reminding them Avoid talking to their children about their grades when they perform below their abilities in school because they don t want to get into a big fight Find a summer job for their kids rather than allow them to seek work on their own To avoid falling into these traps recognize the dangers of raising an overindulged child Being overindulged isn t just for the rich Many middle class parents are either afraid to set rules and enforce them or just aren t paying attention They are often so focused on their own hectic lives that they don t realize that their child is shirking responsibility or not putting forth a solid effort at school This can result in a child who is given too much and held accountable for too little Put another way kids with a work ethic are developmentally enabled while overindulged children are developmentally disabled Let s look at some of the things psychological research has to say about overindulgence Overindulgence produces kids who lack self assertion are more dependent have less concern for others and are less self reliant the more they are overindulged the more they need to be overindulged Bredehoft D J et al Perceptions Attributed to Parental Overindulgence during Childhood 1998 16 Overindulgence is not restricted to giving kids too much Overindulgence also consists of doing too much for them and having lax rules and no chores Bredehoft David et A No Rules Not Enforcing Rules No Chores Lots of Freedom Overindulgence Too http www educarer com oi structure htm Overindulgence is a more important risk factor than peer pressure in terms of the likelihood that children will abuse alcohol and drugs Wilmes David J Parenting for Prevention How to Raise a Child to Say No to Alcohol and Other Drugs Johnson Institute Revised Edition 1995 A work ethic is preventative medicine for overindulgence To understand how this ethic serves as a preventative let s take a brief look at a critical study undertaken by Harvard University beginning in 1939 In what is known as the Harvard Study of Adult Development the lives of 248 Harvard students and 500 young men from working class neighborhoods in Cambridge were literally put under a microscope They went through a battery of interviews with a psychiatrist and a social worker The social worker then traveled throughout the country to meet their parents and secure a complete history of their infant and child development The study tracked their lives for over 40 years They filled out questionnaires every two years provided records of physical exams every

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