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  • GameSpy: Lord of the Rings Games vs. WWII Games - Page 1
    are very similar In both World War II and the War for Middle Earth the allies were attempting to throw a cursed ring into Mount Doom I think shaithis No no what I m saying is I don t get why the gaming industry has to re tread the same themes into the ground Game companies licensed the Lord of the Rings movies and then other game companies licensed the books and now there are a zillion rings games coming out Fargo It s like a Frodopia shaithis Lame Where are the original concepts or game worlds like Thief Ico or Animal Crossing Which was original but so cute it made my eyes bleed Fargo I dunno I can see the appeal It s like Turbine CEO Jeff Anderson said in our recent Look at Licensed Online Roleplaying Games It s like having J R R Tolkien on your design staff shaithis Yeah I can just see that J R R Tolkien leaving his prestigious professorship at the University of Oxford to go work at Electronic Arts Hey guys he d say I want to make it so when you press the button Aragorn does all these cool sword moves

    Original URL path: http://www.gamespy.com/articles/489/489876p1.html (2016-02-16)
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  • GameSpy: Short & Sweet vs. Longer, Less Polished Games - Page 1
    come up with a better Grudge graphic What is that a stopwatch and an hourglass Why not just post a picture of you shrugging your shoulders or maybe phoning it in for the day Fargo Okay then let s back up a bit The fact is many gamers don t want a game that s over too quickly But I ve perfected a system whereby developers can triple quadruple or even sextuple the length of their games and I m willing to sell my secrets to them for some sort of undetermined but absurd consultancy fees plus expenses Let s take a look at some charts and graphs I ve drawn up shaithis The Cut And Paste School of Level Design Fargo That s right See you fight your way through this level which you ll note is actually only one room but turned in different directions with different colored lights through each door Then when you finally get to the end a character appears who tells you you have to go back through the same level back to the beginning Once there there s another dude who tells you that you have to do it again but this time with a time limit And if gamers fail they go back to the beginning shaithis You mean the beginning of the level or the beginning of the timed sequence Fargo I mean the beginning of the game There are no saves and your character is deleted upon death That s covered in chapter two Make Your Measly Content Last Chapter three extols the virtue of time consuming jumping puzzles and the value of making users watch cut scenes again and again By my calculations developers using my technique can stretch an afternoon of pleasurable gaming into a grueling 72 hour

    Original URL path: http://www.gamespy.com/articles/489/489875p1.html (2016-02-16)
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  • GameSpy: What's the Best of the Lord of the Rings Trilogy? - Page 1
    demanding that readers tell us shaithis Hold it Just stop I know exactly how this is going to go down I m going to jump in with a serious paragraph long explanation about why Two Towers was the best and most suspenseful of the three books and then you re going to interrupt me with a couple lines of ridiculous dialogue that infer that you can t tell the difference between Lord of the Rings the X Men or Harry Potter Fargo Looks sheepishly at script then throws it away You re just full of spoilers today aren t you And anyways I can tell the difference I ve written a little cheat sheet on my arm here Harry Potter is about WIZARDS who go to SCHOOL Whereas the X Men are MUTANTS who go to an ACADEMY In contrast the little Lord of the Thingy dudes are totally unschooled A bunch of dropouts I surmise All they do is run around in the woods singing songs and eating special bread shaithis Silently cries What Do You Think Latest The Grudge Small Size vs Big Screen RESULTS Feb 8 2005 Small Size vs Big Screen VOTE Feb 8 2005 2D

    Original URL path: http://www.gamespy.com/articles/489/489873p1.html (2016-02-16)
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  • GameSpy: Arnold the Republican vs. Arnold the Killing Machine - Page 1
    Dole mod for Half Life shaithis There was a Bob Dole mod for Half Life Fargo Yah your only weapon was a ball point pen clasped tightly in your fist shaithis I think it s a little uncool that Ahhnold has a big videogame title coming out in another month while the other candidates just have TV spots or debates Fargo You re right According to California s equal time laws all of the candidates should have their own big budget videogame titles I suggest we start with Leisure Suit Larry Flint shaithis Super McClintock Bros just doesn t have the same ring to it Fargo How about Arianna Huffington s Electric Powered SUV Demolition Rampage shaithis That s good The boss monster from the last level could be Arnold s Hummer Fargo It could be driven by an illegal immigrant shaithis Now you re getting too political Fargo I can t help it My own campaign for governor was derailed when I discovered I would not be allowed to run the state entirely via instant messenger shaithis WTF Next they ll be telling us that California residents can t vote via cell phone while driving Fargo Pretty un American

    Original URL path: http://www.gamespy.com/articles/489/489872p1.html (2016-02-16)
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  • GameSpy: Halo's Master Chief vs. Half-Life's Gordon Freeman - Page 1
    to get into a fight Gordon would show up late Fargo Shush This very serious Grudge must be accompanied by a very serious reverent silence of absolute seriousness shaithis Then why are you wearing a fake mustache Fargo It s not fake Well mostly That is to say it s composed of actual human hair I hope from the head Is it really that obvious shaithis On your chest yes Fargo But what I was trying to say was this very serious Grudge is best handled in the very serious Grudge forums It s too close for you and I to call So I d like to propose a little twist if I may Halo s Master Chief vs Half Life s Gordon Freeman IN A DRINKING MATCH I think Gordon could take im He s got what I like to call The Science shaithis You re kidding right Master Chief is basically a space marine He s a sailor He can probably drink Keith Richards under the table I bet he s more comfortable around hookers too Not like Gordon The only woman who worked in Black Mesa was a hologram Later he was attacked by leather ninja chicks

    Original URL path: http://www.gamespy.com/articles/489/489868p1.html (2016-02-16)
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  • GameSpy: Tommy Vercetti vs. Apu in a Monster Truck - Page 1
    when I had Apu jack a monster truck and went careening into Moe s bar Shiva would be most pleased by this behavior Apu said as I crunched over a cop car skidded into the sidewalk and sent little Ralph Wiggum running for cover That my friend THAT was a beautiful thing shaithis I like all the stuff that happens in the background Like people getting hit in the crotch with footballs More games need to go for the crotch fulla football angle Fargo Now Hit Run was created with the Grand Theft Auto game engine Which begs the question Who would win Tommy Vercetti of Vice City Or Apu master of the hot dog heat lamps shaithis Before you answer consider this In our last Grudge featuring a Simpsons character Groundskeeper Willie demolished Max Payne Fargo On the other hand experience also tells us that Monster Trucks do not guarantee victory If they did I d bring one to Wimbledon shaithis Okay Yoda with the bookmarks what about the fact that The GTA3 Dude smoked the Vice City dude Fargo Well now you ve done it that was just too many links for my short attention span What were

    Original URL path: http://www.gamespy.com/articles/489/489866p1.html (2016-02-16)
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  • GameSpy: Kirby vs. Mega Man - Page 1
    meet I refer back to M C Steven Hawking s critically acclaimed but lesser known work A Brief History of Dreamland As you can see by the scientific diagram I ve drawn to the right if Kirby were to attempt to absorb Mega Man s power at the precise instant that Mega Man attempted to gain his power the forces involved would cause both characters to collapse into a sort of videogaming singularity A single pixel with a gravitational pull so incredible that no powerup could escape shaithis Not even the magic mushroom Fargo Not even the mushroom Or the food from Gauntlet The quad damage from Quake Gone shaithis The horror is rivaled only by its coolness I d spend all day just throwing stuff in there Like the record industry Fargo But we can stop it We can t allow Kirby and Mega Man to fight We ve got to distract them I ll take care of Kirby it s up to you to take Mega Man out shaithis You mean Makes a gun out of his fingers and pulls the trigger Fargo No fool Take him out You know a movie a nice dinner keep his mind

    Original URL path: http://www.gamespy.com/articles/489/489865p1.html (2016-02-16)
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  • GameSpy: Emergent Behavior vs. Scripted Sequences - Page 1
    is when cool stuff happens spontaneously in a game because the rules interact in interesting ways and crazy patterns develop Take your average Grand Theft Auto pileup With only a couple exceptions none of the cars on the road are programmed to do anything specific they just drive around try to avoid accidents or help out gang members in need etc But when the player chucks a molotov cocktail pulls someone out of a truck guns the engine and starts mowing down gang members like he s tending to the lawn all the cool chaos that results when the police bust in and start shooting while old ladies run for cover and gang members start rushing the place with baseball bats is well THAT s emergence And it s a beautiful thing Fargo Now scripted sequences are programmed by the developers like all the cool vignettes that you see while playing through Medal of Honor or Half Life single player The scripting can be very complicated taking into account any number of different things the player can do but in the end it s all pre determined For instance if shai were a scripted character right about now is where he d pun OW MY FACE You PUNCHED me in the FACE shaithis Scripting is fun Actually Fargo and I are pretty much in agreement that emergent games will someday be cooler than laser wielding popes check out my old editorial but right now I don t think that anyone s really making it happen That s why in the meantime I love scripted games They can tell a great story I ve played all the way through Half Life more times than I can count Done well you don t even notice the scripting there s just cool stuff

    Original URL path: http://www.gamespy.com/articles/489/489864p1.html (2016-02-16)
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