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  • Keep Calm & Carry On | Esperanza - Hope To Cope
    am older now stable and still have the rage moments but they are few and far in between I thank you for this article because I never knew others were like this I thought it was an evil part of me that I was embarrassed about I still after all these years have guilt about theses angry days with my kids RELATED ARTICLES How Anger Gets A Bad Rap January 21 2016 12 01 am Are you someone who thinks it is bad to get angry Maybe you know someone like this Over the past 23 years I have worked You Don t Have to Accept Every Invitation to Fight June 11 2015 12 01 am I often find myself thinking about previous patients from the hospital wondering how they re doing I recently had one come to mind thought Money Stress Take this to the bank February 1 2015 12 23 pm These seven steps will help keep money stress from causing depression and anxiety By Kelly James Enger We all have an occasional sleepless night Men Depression NHL Goalie Clint Malarchuck February 1 2015 9 53 am The former hockey goalie shares his story on confronting his depression and anxiety By Linda Childers There was a time when the face CURRENT ISSUE Recent Issues November 1 2015 2 07 pm Fall 2015 GLENNON DOYLE MELTON Truth warrior In her Momastery blog her popular speaking tours and her book Carry On Warrior Glennon Doyle Melton shows it s OK Read more August 1 2015 2 07 pm Summer 2015 LEE WOODRUFF STRESS TEST After a family crisis left Lee Woodruff with symptoms of depression and anxiety she found the courage to reach out for Read more May 5 2015 9 31 am Spring 2015 DEPRESSION WHAT BREED IS YOUR BLACK DOG The unwelcome pup looks different for everyone and your particular form of depression can make a difference in choosing Read more February 1 2015 2 12 pm Winter 2015 TAKE THIS TO THE BANK Stressing out about finances These strategies can help you take control of your wallet and your worries by Kelly James Enger Read more SoundOFF MOMS DEPRESSION What is it like to be a mom with depression What is hardest for you What helps you cope CLICK HERE TO ANSWER CURRENT RESEARCH Shake It Off Not So Easy for People with Depression New Brain Research Suggests 2 27 2015 Harsh winter brings some psychological benefits says UB researcher 2 24 2015 Study Linking Suicidal Behavior Psychotic Experiences May Yield Strategies to Help Prevent Suicide Attempts 2 24 2015 Suicide Risk Falls Substantially After Talk Therapy 11 20 2014 A New Test Measures Analytical Thinking Linked to Depression Fueling the Idea That Depression May Be a Form of Adaptation 11 19 2014 CONNECT esperanza s Hope Write a Letter to the Editor SoundOFF Forum Home About Us My Account Checkout Professional Writers Advertising Contact Us Partners Portal Cart Subscribe Back to Top Copyright 2015 Hope to

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  • Keep Calm & Carry On | Esperanza - Hope To Cope
    yells at his wife for something minor he says I feel terrible It s this extra added layer The guilt kicks in and then the depression kicks in To stop that kind of downward spiral Gilbertson proposes something radical simply accepting the emotion That way instead of feeling angry and hating yourself for it you re just feeling angry she explains We don t get to choose how we feel adds Gilbertson who titled her forthcoming book Constructive Wallowing How to Beat Bad Feelings by Letting Yourself Have Them Anger is an emotion It s not the same as behaviors like violence or aggression And like all feelings it needs to be felt to be resolved It can help to remember that there s always a reason for our anger even if it s not clear what it is Gilbertson says rage in the present may relate to a time in the past when you weren t allowed to have these feelings Plus she says individuals with depression tend to stuff their emotions into a bottle with a stopper This shuts down the anger and despair as well as positive feelings but it also creates a pressure cooker of suppressed emotions that will inevitably resurface If we are afraid of or unfamiliar with our feelings they are more likely to erupt in ways that seem inexplicable making us feel out of control By being on speaking terms with emotions such as anger she contends we put ourselves back in charge Press pause In the calm aftermath most of us wish we could rewind and delete things we ve said or done in anger That s because anger activates the primitive fight or flight portion of our brain essentially hijacking the rational parts of the mind And that s why it s a good idea to befriend your inner pause button If what you feel compelled to do is the right decision now says David Ament a certified domestic violence advocate then it will also be the right decision in an hour So it costs you nothing to pause for an hour or 90 minutes My kids know when I sigh that I m mad But I d rather sigh than say something hurtful Anger management advice often emphasizes taking a deep breath counting to 10 taking a walk listening to music or similar methods for putting your red hot emotion on hold Your reasoning brain can reassert itself and you will have given yourself a little perspective Ament points out Gretchen 47 has adopted a version of bite your tongue to avoid future regret When she felt depressed the Massachusetts resident would yell at her kids for little things like spilled milk When her kids asked why she was so angry she would admit I don t know Determined to be different from her emotionally abusive father Gretchen now skips the rants and heaves a heavy sigh instead My kids know when I sigh that I m mad but I

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  • Temper | Esperanza - Hope To Cope
    Anxiety Emotional Numbness Fear Guilt Irritability Low Self Esteem Pessimism Physical Symptoms Sadness Sleep Problems Stress Substance Abuse Treatment Anxiety and Depression Recovery Treatment Diet Doctors Exercise Hospitalization Humor Medication Meditation Mindfulness Peer Support Pets Animals Psychotherapy Sleep Stress Management Suicide Symptoms of Depression Anxiety Weight Loss or Gain Talk Therapy Relationships Personal Relationships and Anxiety Depression Caregivers Children Dating Family Forgiveness Friends Marriage Parenting School Education Spouse Partners Stigma Hope Celebrities Hope Essays Hope Harmony Spirituality Inspiration Motivation Religion Faith Spirituality Blog Forum Log In Forum Home Topics Discussions Members Community Blog Forum Associations Write to Us SoundOFF Magazine Current Issue Archived Issues Customer Service Print Digital Subscriptions Renewal Subscriptions Gift Subscriptions Buy Past Issues Frequently Asked Questions Digital Subscriber Access Subscribe Home temper Keep Calm Carry On By Lori Hile April 17 2014 1 49 pm Your depression can trigger Anger Attacks When your temper flares try these techniques By Lori Hile As a young stay at home mother of three Read more CURRENT ISSUE Recent Issues November 1 2015 2 07 pm Fall 2015 GLENNON DOYLE MELTON Truth warrior In her Momastery blog her popular speaking tours and her book Carry On Warrior Glennon Doyle Melton shows it s OK Read more August 1 2015 2 07 pm Summer 2015 LEE WOODRUFF STRESS TEST After a family crisis left Lee Woodruff with symptoms of depression and anxiety she found the courage to reach out for Read more May 5 2015 9 31 am Spring 2015 DEPRESSION WHAT BREED IS YOUR BLACK DOG The unwelcome pup looks different for everyone and your particular form of depression can make a difference in choosing Read more February 1 2015 2 12 pm Winter 2015 TAKE THIS TO THE BANK Stressing out about finances These strategies can help you take control

    Original URL path: http://www.hopetocope.com/tag/temper/ (2016-02-14)
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  • Winter 2014 | Esperanza - Hope To Cope
    Subscribe Home Winter 2014 Money Stress Take this to the bank By Kelly James Enger February 1 2015 12 23 pm These seven steps will help keep money stress from causing depression and anxiety By Kelly James Enger We all have an occasional sleepless night Read more Dena Higley A perfect mess By Stephanie Vozza February 1 2015 8 09 am When life didn t follow her script this helicopter mom learned to let go By Stephanie Vozza Dena Higley is used to making people Read more Ask the doctor Rhythm and blues By esperanza April 17 2014 4 03 pm John F Greden MD has been practicing psychiatry for 35 years His clinical specialties include treatment resistant depression and maintenance of wellness The Rachel Upjohn Professor Read more Exercise Myths By Jessica Kraft April 17 2014 3 24 pm Don t let exercise myths keep you on the couch focus on the facts By Jessica C Kraft Everyone gets health benefits from physical activity Read more A new spin on STRESS By Robin L Flanigan April 17 2014 3 11 pm When pressure feels paralyzing flip your attitude and let it propel you instead By Robin L Flanigan Stress is an inevitable part of Read more The reinvention of René Syler By esperanza April 17 2014 2 09 pm The former news anchor emerged from depression with a new sense of self As co anchor of The Early Show as the CBS morning program Read more Keep Calm Carry On By Lori Hile April 17 2014 1 49 pm Your depression can trigger Anger Attacks When your temper flares try these techniques By Lori Hile As a young stay at home mother of three Read more CURRENT ISSUE Recent Issues November 1 2015 2 07 pm Fall 2015 GLENNON

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  • Keep Calm & Carry On | Esperanza - Hope To Cope
    that there s always a reason for our anger even if it s not clear what it is Gilbertson says rage in the present may relate to a time in the past when you weren t allowed to have these feelings Plus she says individuals with depression tend to stuff their emotions into a bottle with a stopper This shuts down the anger and despair as well as positive feelings but it also creates a pressure cooker of suppressed emotions that will inevitably resurface If we are afraid of or unfamiliar with our feelings they are more likely to erupt in ways that seem inexplicable making us feel out of control By being on speaking terms with emotions such as anger she contends we put ourselves back in charge Press pause In the calm aftermath most of us wish we could rewind and delete things we ve said or done in anger That s because anger activates the primitive fight or flight portion of our brain essentially hijacking the rational parts of the mind And that s why it s a good idea to befriend your inner pause button If what you feel compelled to do is the right decision now says David Ament a certified domestic violence advocate then it will also be the right decision in an hour So it costs you nothing to pause for an hour or 90 minutes My kids know when I sigh that I m mad But I d rather sigh than say something hurtful Anger management advice often emphasizes taking a deep breath counting to 10 taking a walk listening to music or similar methods for putting your red hot emotion on hold Your reasoning brain can reassert itself and you will have given yourself a little perspective Ament points out Gretchen 47 has adopted a version of bite your tongue to avoid future regret When she felt depressed the Massachusetts resident would yell at her kids for little things like spilled milk When her kids asked why she was so angry she would admit I don t know Determined to be different from her emotionally abusive father Gretchen now skips the rants and heaves a heavy sigh instead My kids know when I sigh that I m mad but I d rather sigh than say something hurtful she says She consciously avoids discussing anything when she s feeling angry because it s too easy for conversations to escalate into confrontations I wait because it s not going to be helpful if my mood interferes she explains And by waiting she can weigh whether a topic is worth revisiting When it comes right down to it she says There s so much we can let go of in this world Just the facts You arrive home after work Your spouse and kids sit on the couch hypnotized by a mindless TV show Homework is unstarted Dinner uncooked You see the situation as proof that your spouse cares nothing about your needs and your children are lazy so and sos You explode In any given situation fury can be fed by an internal narrative that may not compute Suppose you found out that your family had been in a fender bender and was taking some much needed time to calm down Even if the truth is more mundane it s probably still a stretch to label your kids as worthless layabouts or your spouse an uncaring louse According to Masand individuals with depression tend to both overgeneralize and personalize experiences If one person doesn t like your outfit you are suddenly a terrible dresser If a neighbor fails to say hello he hates you Anger is an emotion And like all feelings it needs to be felt to be resolved Luckily it s possible to identify examples of these distortions and replace them with more realistic characterizations says Masand describing the basis of cognitive behavioral therapy and its offshoots Through therapy Gretchen has worked hard to identify her thought triggers and even finds some of them comical Years ago when her husband was playing with their cat Gretchen got so angry she screamed What is your obsession with Penny We can laugh at it now because it was so stupid she says I was jealous of a cat But I know that was coming from a place of not having the right perception Kris says mindfulness practice such as focusing on the sights and sounds around her to stay in the now makes her less inclined to ruminate or listen to the soundtrack in her head When she does get angry she finds it helpful to ask herself What are the facts of the situation and what is the evidence We all tell ourselves stories that cause us to suffer she muses but most of the time things in life have nothing to do with us Sidebar Find your happy place When irritability and anger twin with depression addressing your underlying mood should be priority one Along with treatment and self care here are a few ways to fight back when you start to feel low Distract yourself Gretchen finds funny movies and silly sitcoms make her feel better Arnold finds catharsis in watching movies like Goodfellas and Reservoir Dogs but also in replaying silly songs in his head Find your bliss Sue enjoys the scenery along the walking path near her Niagara Falls home and cuddling with her cat Gretchen sits outside or walks in the woods indoors she reads a good book Use your hands Kris gardens plays piano and paints For Sue making her own greeting cards refocuses her mind and provides her a private space and time Journal Sue also finds it therapeutic to express her feelings on paper And re reading old entries helps her realize how far she s come Talk to me In the heat of the moment it may be best to bite your tongue But strong communication skills can reduce conflict in a relationship

    Original URL path: http://www.hopetocope.com/keep-calm-carry-on/?replytocom=3001 (2016-02-14)
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  • The Mask of Male Depression | Esperanza - Hope To Cope
    entries Image Verification Loading Tagged with Men Sexual dysfunction About the author esperanza Has 732 Articles RELATED ARTICLES Men Depression NHL Goalie Clint Malarchuck February 1 2015 9 53 am The former hockey goalie shares his story on confronting his depression and anxiety By Linda Childers There was a time when the face Michael Landsberg Going on the record February 1 2013 9 31 am Sportscaster Michael Landsberg host of Off the Record talks about recovery and trounces stigma every chance he gets Viewpoint A crying shame November 5 2012 10 27 am Columnst Michael Rafferty talks about when anger turns to tears One Two Punch November 3 2011 1 43 pm A diagnosis of depression and anxiety can leave a guy feeling less than manly CURRENT ISSUE Recent Issues November 1 2015 2 07 pm Fall 2015 GLENNON DOYLE MELTON Truth warrior In her Momastery blog her popular speaking tours and her book Carry On Warrior Glennon Doyle Melton shows it s OK Read more August 1 2015 2 07 pm Summer 2015 LEE WOODRUFF STRESS TEST After a family crisis left Lee Woodruff with symptoms of depression and anxiety she found the courage to reach out for Read more May 5 2015 9 31 am Spring 2015 DEPRESSION WHAT BREED IS YOUR BLACK DOG The unwelcome pup looks different for everyone and your particular form of depression can make a difference in choosing Read more February 1 2015 2 12 pm Winter 2015 TAKE THIS TO THE BANK Stressing out about finances These strategies can help you take control of your wallet and your worries by Kelly James Enger Read more SoundOFF MOMS DEPRESSION What is it like to be a mom with depression What is hardest for you What helps you cope CLICK HERE TO ANSWER CURRENT RESEARCH Shake It Off Not So Easy for People with Depression New Brain Research Suggests 2 27 2015 Harsh winter brings some psychological benefits says UB researcher 2 24 2015 Study Linking Suicidal Behavior Psychotic Experiences May Yield Strategies to Help Prevent Suicide Attempts 2 24 2015 Suicide Risk Falls Substantially After Talk Therapy 11 20 2014 A New Test Measures Analytical Thinking Linked to Depression Fueling the Idea That Depression May Be a Form of Adaptation 11 19 2014 CONNECT esperanza s Hope Write a Letter to the Editor SoundOFF Forum Home About Us My Account Checkout Professional Writers Advertising Contact Us Partners Portal Cart Subscribe Back to Top Copyright 2015 Hope to Cope All Rights Reserved Newsletter Signup esperanza Magazine s e newsletter offers the latest research news healthy lifestyle features and inspirational profiles for our depression and anxiety community If you are a human and are seeing this field please leave it blank Fields marked with a are required Afghanistan Albania Algeria American Samoa Andorra Angola Anguilla Antarctica Antigua And Barbuda Argentina Armenia Aruba Australia Austria Azerbaijan Bahamas Bahrain Bangladesh Barbados Belarus Belgium Belize Benin Bermuda Bhutan Bolivia Bosnia And Herzegowina Botswana Bouvet Island Brazil British Indian

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  • The Mask of Male Depression | Esperanza - Hope To Cope
    believes his depression started when he was a teenager But the former architectural draftsman said his own negative self talk prevented him seeking help until 2000 I was very critical of myself says Dave adding that he started medication and talk therapy only after he began to fear he might end his own life I d just blame it on my character I thought I was lazy not worthwhile not fun to be around and that it was all my fault Men in general are very reluctant to cry and express deeper feelings I was no different Simply put I viewed it as a weakness not an illness And for years I had no idea what was wrong with me An established body of evidence from neuroscience genetics and clinical trials shows that depressive illnesses are brain disorders But just what causes them is still being studied Modern brain imaging technologies show that in depression neural circuits responsible for the regulation of moods thinking sleep appetite and behavior fail to function properly and critical neurotransmitters chemicals that brain cells use to communicate are out of balance In some families depressive disorders seem to occur generation after generation But they can also occur in people with no family history Research shows that risk for depression results from the influence of multiple genes acting together with environmental or other non genetic factors It took me awhile to accept that I was depressed Being a guy people think that you need to man up and not talk about it Therapists have identified social factors as the leading reason why men have long been left in the dark when it comes to being identified and treated for depression Rabinowitz a professor of psychology at the University of Redlands in California says men often experience depression differently from women Culturally women have more words to describe their inner emotional world and men have fewer words to describe it says Rabinowitz who leads depression support groups for men So for guys there s more of a tendency to try to distract themselves from the nagging from that emotional world They may be grumpy or irritable or lose their sense of humor They might drink too much or abuse drugs They might work all the time or compulsively seek thrills in high risk behavior Or they may become isolated and no longer interested in the people or things they used to enjoy Take Dave for example It was hard for me to derive any sort of joy from any activities in my life he says I was withdrawn and always took a pessimistic view I could never feel there was meaning or purpose in life Chuck says his depression has kept him from using his bachelor s degree so he works minimum wage jobs instead I don t want to answer the phone I don t want to watch TV I wake up sometimes and just say ugh I just stay asleep and try to avoid the

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  • Men | Esperanza - Hope To Cope
    record By Robin L Flanigan February 1 2013 9 31 am Sportscaster Michael Landsberg host of Off the Record talks about recovery and trounces stigma every chance he gets Read more Viewpoint A crying shame By Michael Rafferty November 5 2012 10 27 am Columnst Michael Rafferty talks about when anger turns to tears Read more One Two Punch By esperanza November 3 2011 1 43 pm A diagnosis of depression and anxiety can leave a guy feeling less than manly Read more Terry Bradshaw Quarterback Scramble By esperanza August 12 2010 11 45 am Buried by 300 pound linemen Terry Bradshaw got up shook it off and called another play Blitzed by depression he couldn t bounce back on his own Time for a new game plan Read more SoundOFF Men at Midlife By esperanza May 10 2010 12 30 pm What challenges of middle age fed into your mood disorder what symptoms affect you and how do you handle it Read more Beyond burnt out By esperanza May 10 2010 12 19 pm For some men hitting the middle years of life brings on a dark night of the soul Read more Taking the Field Against Depression By esperanza November 20 2009 9 25 am Top athletes face an inner foe their depression Read more SOUNDOFF By esperanza May 19 2009 9 59 am As a man how has depression impacted your life and what approach have you taken to feel better Read more The Mask of Male Depression By esperanza May 19 2009 9 45 am For a long time Chuck P didn t know what was wrong with him A former customer service representative at Wal Mart in Bowling Green Kentucky he sometimes lashed out at coworkers and shoppers Eventually he attended anger management classes only

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